Real Talk / Real Moms: Growing a Family

MotherhoodWhen it comes to growing our family of three to four – we asked ourselves, should we wait or have another right away? Both Eric and I went back and forth about the age difference we would want between our kids. If it were up to Eric we would already have baby number two on the way, but I’m an only child and wanted to spend quality time with Jackson as the only kid in the household.

Now, I know there isn’t a magic number of years between each kid but I’ve always wanted at least two years between baby one and two. Here are a few things that I think about having baby number two:

The second pregnancy isn’t like the first.

Now, I had a pretty rough pregnancy in terms of sickness. I had all day sickness until I was seven months pregnant. Part of the reason I’ve wanted to wait on having baby number two is because if I do get sick again, I want to be prepared for how I felt with Jackson.

There is no perfect time.

Although we may be “planning” when we want to ideally have baby number two, there is no perfect time. Just like baby number one – your world is turned completely around but the experience is incredible.

There will probably be moments of freaking out.

Yes, just like when you are pregnant with your first little, you have those “am I ready?” moments. I felt very ready for Jackson to arrive and excited. I know I’ll be just as excited for a second, but since I am an only child I will probably have some of those “oh my goodness” moments a little more.

These are the three things I think about most when deciding when we should grow our family. I’d love to hear from all of you about expanding your family. What’s the best piece of advice you can give? What do you love most about having a family of four or five or more? Any wise words you can share, I’d love to hear them.

Read about how these other amazing mamas have to say about co-parenting!

Could I Have That
Parker Etc.
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The Refined Woman
The Effortless Chic
Ave Styles
Sarah Sherman Samuel
Sugar and Charm
The Life Styled

And be sure to check out past posts from this series.

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  1. Lisa Ferris

    That was like reading my life! I’m also an only child & our first child is also called Jackson! (He’s now 22). My husband & I wanted at least 3 years between our two but at 2 years, 3 months we we’re nowhere near ready for our second..,.so wait we did!
    So almost 5 years to the day our second son Harley was born. For us it was the best decision, we gave Jackson our time, he had 6 months at home before school started so didn’t think he’d been replaced….
    The only that age gap has been an issue was when Jackson was about 14/15 & Harley was 9/10. Jack really struggled with the annoying little brother but they got through it & now at 22 & 17 respectively they are best mates!
    Good luck with your decision.
    Lisa xx

    1. Caitlin

      Loved hearing your story – thank you so much for sharing. We have definitely always had three years difference in our minds. It seems like a good age difference. We are cherishing this time with just Jackson. ps. I LOVE the name Harley!!

  2. Christine

    What a beautiful photo. I agree there is no perfect formula for timing your pregnancies. I have three daughters, each six years apart. I know that is not the norm, but I think it was great for them because each had my full attention through the pre-school years and I had a chance to recover and get over sleep deprivation before the next pregnancy. It was also delicious having a baby in the house over so many years. On the other hand, as the years went by, we endured 18 years of one moody teenager after another!!! Another thought: I met a Swedish woman who told me that they can prolong their paid maternity leave if they give birth again before their baby is two years old. So most women try to have a second child around the two year point. Apparently they have done studies and have found that it would be better to wait somewhat longer. Two year olds are so temperamental; it’s even harder for them to regulate their emotions when there is a new baby in the house.

    1. Caitlin

      Thank you so much for sharing your story – love hearing what other moms have to say about this topic.